I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
