i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize