You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
