so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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