I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
