Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
