Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
