I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
