I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
