Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
