I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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