A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
