You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
