just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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