the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
