is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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