Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
