How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
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