I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Randomize