Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
