This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
