Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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