yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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