How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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