Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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