problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
