Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
