This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
