he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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