people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I am full of burrito and curiosity
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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