ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Randomize
