I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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