I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize