You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
