Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize