I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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