Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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