this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
