I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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