Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize
