physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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