You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize