OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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