My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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