She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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