Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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