It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize