You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
