The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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