dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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