Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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